Post-Abortion Syndrome: There’s A Way Back
Take Courage and Admit It
It takes courage to admit that you might need help. You made the decision to have an abortion and it seemed like the only thing to do at the time, so why do you feel so guilty?
Have the courage to admit that you made a wrong decision and now you are suffering for it. Peace of conscience won’t come by denying your guilt. The abortion counselor probably is not suffering; the others who pressured you probably are not suffering only you.
Admit that YOU chose to let a budding life die. Regardless of what caused you to do it, ADMIT IT WAS WRONG. Your regret, your guilt, and your remorse are there because your conscience condemns you. But don’t give up now, for there is hope in God!
Abortion is a sin against God and yourself. Admit your sin to God, your Father. He has forgiven you. He sent his beloved Son to bear your sin and guilt. Jesus paid the price for your sins as the innocent Lamb of God, slain so that your sin would never be counted against you.
“Surely he took up our pain and bore our suffering, yet we considered him punished by God, stricken by him, and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed. We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.” (Isaiah 53:4-6) Focus your attention on the cross of your Savior and contemplate the tremendous love and mercy God has for YOU. Believe his precious promise of forgiveness.
Let It Out
Don’t wait any longer. If you have not allowed yourself to grieve for the loss of your baby — do it now. Go ahead and pour out your tears in the presence of your Lord, Jesus Christ. It is his forgiveness that allows you to grieve without the feeling of despair. Tell him out loud, step by step, what happened to you and let your heart hurt. Open the wound up ALL the way so that he can reach in and heal you. Give over to HIM all the thoughts, nightmares and hopeless dreams about that baby.
“Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge” (Psalm 62:8). Allow the Lord time to heal you with his joy.
Forgive Yourself and Others
Because God has forgiven you, forgive yourself! God has forgiven all your sins in his Son. Honor him by doing the same.
Now search your heart. Are you also holding someone else accountable for your abortion decision? Forgive them just as God has forgiven you.
Living With Remorse
Once you have asked God to forgive you, lay that guilt down. When we promise to forgive, we are promising no longer to bring the sin up to others or even to ourselves. Do not pick it up again, especially when you are feeling alone or depressed. It is the trap of the Evil One to make you doubt God’s ability to forgive and to forget your sin.
Remember that your forgiveness stands secure in Christ. However, it may well be that at times you will continue to suffer consequences for your abortion such as regret, remorse and a sense of loss. Here are some extra suggestions to help you through those times:
- Set aside 20 minutes to be alone, no more.
- Turn on some worshipful and edifying music that honors God’s goodness.
- USE YOUR BIBLE. Reflect on scriptures that teach of God’s faithfulness and love (2 Timothy 2:13; Psalm 9:9; 34:18; 36:5).
- Thank God for your salvation, your life, and all his goodness. Thank God for all that he has accomplished already for you in your life.
- When your time for remorse is over, STOP! Give thanks to God. Remember that these times will lessen in intensity and frequency as you grow in your relationship with the Lord. “Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love” (Lamentations 3:32).