Family Topics

Q&A on IVF and Sin

QUESTION: Is it a sin for a single woman to have a child through in vitro fertilization simply because she wants to be a mother? ANSWER: The simple answer is “no,” but as you might have already guessed, it is a bit more complicated than that. Results and Methods...

Q&A on IVF and Sin

QUESTION: Is it a sin for a single woman to have a child through in vitro fertilization simply because she wants to be a mother? ANSWER: The simple answer is “no,” but as you might have already guessed, it is a bit more complicated than that. Results and Methods...

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Relationships Require Work

CLAIM: A good marriage should be easy. If I must work so hard to be happy, I’d rather be alone. REBUTTAL: This claim is short and to the point. I am going to venture a guess that the problem here is a flawed understanding of happiness and how we achieve it. So, let’s...

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Learning from Marriage Mistakes

CLAIM: My parents got divorced, and I had to suffer through their terrible marriage my entire childhood. Why would I put myself in that situation? REBUTTAL: Witnessing or experiencing something terrible tends to make us very anecdotal. That can lead us to greatly...

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Plan B: What You Should Know

What is Plan B? Plan B, often called the morning-after pill, is similar to typical birth control pills but contains a higher level of synthetic hormones. It is “effective” up to 72 hours after unprotected sex. How Does Plan B Work? Plan B is designed to suppress...

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Comfort Through the Sorrow of Miscarriage

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources Miscarriage is a deeply painful and often misunderstood experience that touches the lives of many families within the Christian community, including my own. As believers, we grapple with the profound...

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IVF: A Blessing or a Problem?

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources On July 25, 1978, the world learned of the birth of the first baby using a process called in vitro fertilization (IVF), or “outside the womb” fertilization. Quickly dubbed by the press as the world’s...

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Q&A on Ectopic Pregnancy

QUESTION: The doctor said I may have a tubal pregnancy. Is that human life? Is it possible to move it to the uterus? Or do they just have to kill off the egg in the tube? ANSWER: An “ectopic pregnancy” is when an egg, after fertilization, fails to make it to the...

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Returning Home

Written by Rachel The Parable of the Lost Son 11 Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them. 13 “Not long after that, the younger son got...

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Q&A on Donating Eggs

QUESTION: I'm interested in donating my eggs and I'm wondering if there is any way to ensure that they will not be discarded or used for science in a way that would not be God-pleasing. Do we have a Christian resource that accepts egg donations? Is it wasteful or...

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Embryo Adoption

What is Embryo Adoption? When couples use in vitro fertilization to achieve pregnancy, they will often have embryos remaining after they complete their family. One option available to them is to donate those embryos to another couple. Embryo adoption allows the family...

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Today’s Media: Parental Discernment

Mr. Timothy Snyder dis-cern-ment [noun]: keenly selective judgment, good taste and judgment "Parents, it's 11:00 P.M. ... Do you know where your children are?" Are you old enough to remember local television stations broadcasting this public service announcement every...

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Would You Like to Go to a Movie?

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources Solomon Wrote (Ecclesiastes 1:9): "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun." I think of this passage often as I counsel families facing...

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Family Values

Rev. Gary P. Baumler "God sets the lonely in families." (Psalm 68:6) We have the challenge to promote the family and help build solid Christian families in our midst. Here is one inescapable fact: We all come from a family. We all were born of a mother and sired by a...

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Sharing the Facts of Life

Pastor James A. Aderman I trusted him when he told me, "I love you." He trusted me when I said the same. We trusted our emotions when they said, "It's OK. Show each other how much you care." When our relationship died, so did part of me. Even now as I relive the...

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Saying ‘Yes’ to Sex

Pastor Rolfe Westendorf Society has always had trouble with the subject of sex. Some societies like the Victorian have hidden the topic in a closet as if it did not exist. Sex went on as usual, including its rankest forms of abuse, but it was never mentioned in polite...

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Choosing a Doctor Who Shares Your Faith

Janet C. Lindemann, M.D. In a Christian doctor-patient relationship, faith is the common bond. How good it is for patient and doctor to share the same faith. I love caring for patients of my own church - so many barriers are removed. When a woman in her early forties...

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When Dad Hits Mom

Victor Vieth, Assistant County Attorney, Cottonwood County, MN Seven suggestions to make your congregation safe for victims of domestic violence. In my career as a prosecutor, I have worked with hundreds of victims of domestic violence. I have seen the toll that...

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Saved Sex Is the Only Safe Sex

Ryan MacPherson As a teenager, I hear the media telling my peers and me about sex more than any other topic. I have to ask myself two questions: What are they telling us? And, are we listening? Overwhelmingly, they are telling us about “safe sex.” And it seems we are...

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Children in Church: Trial-by-Diaper

Rachel Mendell One woman encourages those who brave the terrors of worship with children. I look around and count babies, and I feel a little envy. My youngest is four now. I look around and see the young, fussy children struggling to stay still in church, and I am...

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WANTED: A Truly Beautiful Wife

Pastor Mark A. Paustian What to look for when choosing the woman you want to marry. I married the most beautiful woman I ever met. She was charming and funny, lively and loved by all. Her greatest personal gifts were with children -- an excellent sign. And her face I...

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Reserving Sex for Marriage

Pastor Fredric Piepenbrink God’s precious gift of sex is only for those who publicly promise faithfulness to one another for life. Since the sexual revolution of the 1960s, the idea of reserving sexual relations for married couples has become utterly old-fashioned....

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Children Belong in Church

Laurie Biedenbender Is the sound of children disturbing or delightful? How children and adults benefit from children attending worship. "I wonder if it's worth it to bring him to church at all." Steve Bilitz, family ministry director at Christ, North St. Paul, Minn.,...

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Two Halves of a Complementary Whole

Professor Mary L. Heins, Wisconsin Lutheran College, Milwaukee, WI What our God-given gender differences are and how understanding them can help you communicate better with the opposite sex. We don't have to read very far into Genesis before we learn that God created...

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Breaking The Silence of Adam

Mark Clifford Brunner The Bible says that life is precious and that it needs to be guarded and held as sacred. The Lord told Noah: "And for your lifeblood I will surely demand an accounting... And from each man I will demand an accounting for the life of his fellow...

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‘Til Death Us Do Part

Armin J. Panning Marriage has been instituted by God, and he continues to regulate it. The dream of many a young girl is to be a June bride. For reasons not entirely clear, June remains a popular wedding month. A couple's wedding is -- and rightly should be -- a big...

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Gay Marriage Commentary

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources Gay marriage is the moral issue "flavor of the month." We have had a few: abortion, assisted suicide (euthanasia), promiscuity, divorce, embryo destruction, cloning, gay rights, drug abuse, etc. For...

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Parenting When Your Child Goes Down the Wrong Path

Susan Bondow When Things Go Wrong: What to do, and not to do, when your child goes down the wrong path. David and Dennis are brothers. They share the same Mom and Dad and grew up in the same household, but that is where the similarities stop. David is an above-average...

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Our Marriage Mechanic

Pastor James Aderman Determining, "Who's to blame?" requires spouses to be on opposing teams. Husbands and wives become teammates when they ask, "What exactly is wrong, and how do we fix it?" "You're late. We started supper without you." Ice-sickled words. I heard...

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Empty Nesting Is for the Birds

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources This issue of Clearly Caring is arriving in the mail between Mothers Day and Fathers Day two really big family holidays. My writing assignment for this commentary came to me the morning after my...

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The Purity Ring

Michael and Judith Hayes Most little girls dream of the day they will meet their Prince Charming. A young woman begins preparing to meet the real love of her life when she is still harboring her Barbie dolls, dress-up clothes and pop beads in her closet or old toy...

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Love and Respect in Ephesians 5

Christianity Today, the largest evangelical Protestant periodical in our country recently conducted a major survey of 1,250 subscribers who were chosen at random. Close to 750 subscribers and/or their spouses (divided almost equally between the sexes) completed...

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Today’s Media: Righteous Indignation

Mr. Tim Snyder Righteous indignation. You know the feeling. You find something so offensive you start to seethe inside. It’s a jumbled mix of emotions and souls are at stake. You hate the sin and at the same time feel compelled to speak the truth in love. When was the...

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Is He the One?

Laurie Biedenbender Mom gives advice on what to look for when searching for "Mr. Right." Dear Daughter, Since you were a tiny baby, I've prayed for you: that you grow in your love for Jesus, that you find your niche in the body of Christ, that you stay healthy, and...

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Depo-Provera, Cyclo-Provera, Norplant

This is an overview of the information in The Christian and Birth Control book, published by Christian Life Resources. To purchase the book click on the link at the bottom of this page. Until now, this book dealt with what one might consider to be relatively certain...

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Blessings of a Disability

Rev. Thomas Trapp An interview with Kenneth Schleef, a Christian with cerebral palsy. Q: Your appearance at a Life Chain told me you're concerned about life issues. I also know you have cerebral palsy. Tell me about your cerebral palsy first and then we'll talk about...

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Fetal Pain: OK, What’s the Point?

Pastor Robert Fleischmann, CLR National Director Researchers claim they found a dramatic rise in fetal stress hormones when they inserted a needle into fetuses for blood transfusions. Already I hear some of my peers exclaiming, "I told you so!" The concept of fetal...

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Ways to Handle Peer Pressure

Walk away from a bad/dangerous situation Make the decision for yourself as to what you do Think ahead about the outcome of your actions --- can you live with the consequences? Avoid those people who might lead you to do things you don't want to do Hang with friends...

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Who Needs the Counseling Here?

Sometimes It Is Not Just the Pregnant Woman Many of the women who come to the Pregnancy Care Center need a lot of sound Christian help. But sometimes they bring with them someone who is in much greater need of help than they are. Sometimes it is a husband, boyfriend,...

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Psalm 139 Says What Needs Saying

Pastor Joel C. Gerlach A noted Scottish churchman, Erskine of Linlathen, once said that Psalm 139 was one bit of writing he would choose to have on hand on his deathbed. Perhaps not your choice, nor mine either for that matter. But not a bad choice. Not because of...

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He’s Always There

Pastor Mark Cordes He’s Always There – or – Thou, God, Seest Me In the name of Christ our Life, my dear Christian friends: I once received a postcard which read, Dear Clergy, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day present a crisis of faith for many couples who find themselves...

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The Value of Self-Esteem

Pastor Rolfe F. Westendorf We want to reject the misuse and the distortions of self-esteem, not waste the value that the concept provides. Some years ago, social scientists recognized what most have known for a long time people who are confident in their abilities...

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Q&A on Birth Control Pills

QUESTION: I have heard that birth control pills do not prevent conception but really cause early abortions? Is this true? ANSWER: The history of the birth control pill has been controversial for several reasons. One point of debate has been whether the pill may induce...

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A Biblical Look at Sperm Donation

Rev. Robert Fleischmann National Director, Christian Life Resources A common method of sperm retrieval (masturbation with the assistance of pornography) involves a violation of the sixth commandment (Matthew 5:28; Colossians 3:5; Exodus 20:14). Many ethical and...

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The Pill

This is an overview of the information in The Christian and Birth Control book, published by Christian Life Resources. To purchase the book click on the link at the bottom of this page. It is more than coincidental that this topic has been left for last in the book....

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I’m Your Child

The following was written by Justin, a ten-year-old born in 1986 in Korea, who was adopted by Roger and Lynne Tews of Cedarburg, Wisconsin, when he was seven-months-old. To My Birth Mom and Dad, I hope you remember me. I'm your child. The reason I'm writing is because...

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Adopted from China

Krista Preston The government of China wanted my baby dead. Was it because she was second born or because she was a girl? Because a political directive in China allows only one child per family, she could have been aborted or received a saline injection into her skull...

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Open Adoption

Gloria Hochman and Anna Huston, National Adoption Center What is Open Adoption? Open adoption means that birthparents and adoptive parents have some knowledge about one another. The birthparents know something about the adoptive parents and may even help choose them....

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Well, At Least I Wasn’t Adopted

Diane E. Schroeder, President, National Lutherans For Life This column is dedicated to the birth parents of my children and all the millions more who sacrificed to give life and love to their children through adoption. "Well, at least I’m not adopted." The hurtful...

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Adopted Into God’s Family

Rev. Paul Prange When I was born, my parents could not take care of my spiritual needs. They certainly had faith of their own. But they knew that they could not pass salvation on to me by being my physical parents (John 3:6). So they brought me to the only living God...

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Living Large in Your Christian Home Life

By Mr. Tim Snyder, Media Services Coordinator for Wisconsin Lutheran College, Milwaukee, WI Living Large – To live an extravagant or self-indulgent lifestyle. (Dictionary.com) Is your family living large? I'm not talking about a life of luxury. This is about a...

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It Depends How You Say It

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources When the United States legalized abortion on January 22, 1973, the language changed. No longer was a little one growing and kicking in the womb referred to as a “baby.” Rather, the child was reduced...

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The Legacy of Love

Mrs. Lynn Klammer One of the simplest, yet most profound, interactions I ever had with another human being came during the afternoon of an otherwise uneventful day. I had only been married for about a year, and my mother-in-law had just – as she did countless times...

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January 22: A Sad Milestone

On this date in 1666 Emperor Shah Jahan, a descendant of Genghis Khan died. Not a big deal for most of us except Jahan built the Taj Mahal as a mausoleum for his third wife, Arjumand Banu Begum. Despite having multiple wives, Jahan was especially devoted to Begum. In...

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Q&A on the Beginning of Life

QUESTION: When does life begin? I know that life begins at the time of conception. I say with the Psalmist, “Truly I was sinful from birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived.” But when does conception take place? Is it at the moment the egg is fertilized, or is...

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My Son, Maxwell

By Lisa Van Drese My son, Maxwell, was born on April 6, 2011. He was diagnosed with Down syndrome (DS) when he was two days old. I have since learned that Down syndrome, also known as trisomy 21, is a chromosomal condition involving all or part of a third copy of...

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Should I Baptize My Baby?

Christian Life Resources Why Baptize Babies? The Bible doesn’t tell us anywhere how old a person must be at the time of baptism. Jesus commanded us to baptize "all nations" (Matthew 28:19) and doesn’t make any mention of an individual’s age. The jailer at Philippi and...

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How You Can Parent Your Teen

Gerald F. Kastens, former administrator of the Commission on Youth Discipleship Nine tips you can use to strengthen your family. Twenty years ago, being a father seemed rather easy--challenging, but not terribly complicated. Fairly regular devotions, rules about...

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Prenatal Testing

1. Reasons for Testing (Motive) Enhance life to provide life-saving information and treatment Enhance death to eliminate children affected by physical deformity, wrong sex, or maternal preference 2. The Truth about Prenatal Testing (the search for the perfect baby) It...

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How to Raise Godly Daughters

Mrs. Laurie Biedenbender Tips to help you raise a unique Christian women Raising godly daughters today is like flying a kite in a hurricane. The mighty winds of the world keep battering against us. Looking for examples Read the teen mags' headlines: "How to Flirt with...

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Q&A on Miscarriage

QUESTION: A friend of mine just had a miscarriage. She seems okay on the outside, but I know she is hurting. What can I do to help her? ANSWER: Miscarriage is often overlooked as a painful event. You are very considerate and observant to recognize the loss and pain...

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Divorce is Not an Option

Rev. Walter F. Beckmann I just finished reading a book my family gave me for Christmas -- Tom Brokaw's best seller, The Greatest Generation. It's a series of interviews with members of that generation called to fight World War II. My family knew I'd appreciate that...

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Q&A on Divorce and Remarriage

Rev. John F. Brug QUESTION: When may a divorced person remarry in the church? ANSWER: Scripture does not treat in detail the moral propriety of remarriage after a divorce. Clearly, persons who have suffered wrongful divorces, inflicted by their spouses, are free to...

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We Live Together as a Family

Rev. David J. Valleskey, Former President of Wisconsin Lutheran Seminary, Mequon, WI We Live Together as a Family... To the Glory of God As a family, the first thing we do is love one another. We were not a family. We have become a family -- by the grace of God. Now...

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Behind Every Athlete

Dan Peterson A friend of mine once said that coaching is teaching children to be the best they can be. Setting the Focus In both the public and private school settings, I have found an enormous advantage to coach athletes in Lutheran schools where I have the ability...

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The Preborn Child and Faith

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. (Hebrews 11:1) The biological argument for protecting preborn human life should be compelling enough. Arguing for...

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The Preborn Child and Biology

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. (Psalm 139:13,14)...

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Our Baby’s Life Begins (Fetal Development)

Day 1: Today your life began. The egg from your mother was fertilized by the father’s sperm within one of your mother’s two fallopian tubes. You received 23 chromosomes from each parent. You are unique and individual. Days 5-9: From the moment of fertilization you...

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Tell the Truth

By Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director of Christian Life Resources Why Are We Here? Christian Life Resources (CLR) was never a ministry about convincing pro-life people to be pro-life. Though we serve all people, we are doctrinally aligned with the Wisconsin...

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Q&A on Pornography and Divorce

QUESTION: I have been married nearly 30 years. Over those years I have caught my husband buying porn magazines. I told him I don't like it. I pay the bills and this past week I found a charge on our credit card for $81.46 for RachelleXXX through Paypal. I think it's...

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Competing to Get Ahead

Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director, Christian Life Resources "They eat their young" is one phrase used to explain the ruthless nature of some people as they strive to get ahead in the world. Parents remind their children that it is a dog-eat-dog world" out...

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My Wife, the Multi-Parent

Captain LeRoy Kiecker Being deployed is hard on the family. Like almost everyone deployed, I left behind family members, including my wife and two small boys, ages two and almost five. My wife and I often discuss which of the two of us has more difficulties while I’m...

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A Family Tradition of Pro-Life Activism

Traditions create treasured practices in families. They tend to play a very important role in creating family ties and give family members special memories to carry throughout life and are passed on to the next generation. Here is a family tradition I’d like to share...

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The Internet Predator

Pop Quiz: Where is your child safer? a) Walking alone down a dark alley in a rough part of town late at night. b) Sitting at home on their phone, tablet, or computer in the middle of the day. The obvious answer seems to be b—but in reality, it may be just as...

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A Glimpse at a Blended Family

Let's talk about blended families. A blended family is what occurs when a man and woman marry, and one or both bring with them children from a previous marriage or relationship. They come with their own set of challenges and that is the focus of this article. I know...

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Parenting Tips

Raising a child brings countless benefits, and many parents report that it is the most rewarding job they ever have. However, parenting also presents unique and very stressful situations which can be difficult to properly deal with. It can often be difficult to...

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Q&A on Questionable Clothing

QUESTION: Many of my daughter’s friends are wearing outfits that I feel are inappropriate. I am very disappointed that my daughter is now wearing some of the same styles. How can I address this with her so she understands the seriousness of her decisions? ANSWER: You...

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Bridging the Generations

"No cowboy was ever faster on the draw than a grandparent pulling a baby picture out of a wallet." - Author Unknown There is probably no image more heartwarming than a beaming grandmother tenderly holding her newborn grandchild. Equally appealing is the picture of a...

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Making the Most of Family Time

Rev. James A. Aderman Expect that friends will not understand that you won't play softball every Tuesday night, in order to be at home with the kids. "I just don't have the time," I sighed in exasperation. "I dearly want to be a good father to my daughters, but...

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Family Traditions That Cherish Life

Wonderful aromas are wafting in from the kitchen. A juicy turkey continues to roast in the oven, and the spicy scent of a baked pumpkin pie still lingers in the air. In the living room, the lights are dimmed, and the glow of the Christmas tree and the flicker of the...

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Profound Thoughts About Mothers

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. ~Tenneva Jordan Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. (Matthew 5:42) Some mothers...

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Looking Down the Road

In the Old Testament, Adam and Eve demonstrated shortsightedness when they ate the forbidden tree in the Garden of Eden (Genesis 3). When Cain killed Abel (Genesis 4), he failed to consider the consequence of his action. Lot never considered possible negative...

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The Complexities of Charlie Gard

By Rev. Robert Fleischmann, National Director of Christian Life Resources Background Charlie Gard was born in England on August 4, 2016, to Chris Gard and Connie Yates. A few weeks after his birth Charlie was diagnosed with mitochondrial DNA depletion syndrome (MDDS),...

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